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The Slice #30

The Slice #30

from your friendly, neighborhood pizza joint

April 07, 2023

What's up pizza people?!? This is The Slice, the newsletter with more shots in our bag than Tiger. This week, we're talking about The Masters! If you're golf nerds like we are, this is one of your favorite weeks of the year!

GOLF HEAVEN

If you or someone you love is obsessed with golf, you probably already know: Masters Week is like Christmas for us dimple heads. Augusta National has it all; the calming timbre of Jim Nantz welcoming you to the broadcast, the incredibly lush and verdant grounds, and the vibrant splashes of blooming azaleas dotting the landscape - this is golf heaven. On top of the pure aesthetic perfection, it's also home to one of the most dramatic and fiercely contested tournaments of the year. Just contending at Augusta can completely change the trajectory of a golfer's career, and a win makes you damn near immortal. There have been plenty of memorable moments, but most of ours are centered around the GOAT - Tiger Woods. It was absolutely amazing seeing a 21-year-old Tiger dominate the field in 1997, while also opening up conversations about race and privilege in what was historically a very stuffy sport. It might have been even cooler seeing him come all the way back from all of his demons and win in 2019. From celebrating with his own father in 1997, he came full circle to celebrate with his children in 2019. If that moment didn't make you cry, you are probably a robot.

MASTERS CONCESSIONS

Tickets to golf heaven are NOT easy to come by. Not only are they crazy expensive, but you have to enter a lottery to even have a chance at dropping all that money on them. Once you get to Augusta, things get a little easier. The food at The Masters is crazy cheap. The reason behind this is simple: when they're already charging you an arm and a leg for everything else (they'll make roughly 70 MILLION in merch sales this week), they can take it easy on food prices. It's basically the opposite of movie theaters, who only keep 5-15% from ticket sales, and then make a killing on popcorn and soda. But aside from being dirt cheap, Masters concessions food is famous for being, like, pretty damn good. The most famous of them all is the pimento cheese sando, but as this guy can tell you, they're all pretty good!

PIMENTO CHEESE PLEASE

LONG JOHN DALY

Aside from Tiger, big John Daly is one of our favorite golfers. This Hooters-loving, Diet Coke-swilling redneck is not the classiest guy, but no one is better at rockin' mullets, bombin' drives, and rippin' cigs. We're sure you're familiar with an Arnold Palmer (lemonade and iced tea), but if you add some booze, you've got yourself a John Daly. Even though he's not playing in The Masters, we're featuring a take on Long John's eponymous cocktail this weekend! "Amen Corner" features Remy Martin 1738 Cognac, Aperitivo Nonino, Rishi Saffron Bitter Tea, Muscavado Syrup, and Lemon! With one sip, you'll be transported to a warm, sunny day on the links.